Sunday, December 4, 2011

BUT I asked for a sister...

I was an only child for 5 years when my mom finally grew a baby bump, making me an older sister.  I prayed every night during her pregnancy that she would have a girl…I ate all my vegetables,  said my “please and thank-you’s”, and did everything I was told…hoping God would answer my prayers and reward my good behavior.

I was anything but thrilled when my grandparents drove me to the hospital to visit my new little brother.  I begged my parents to trade him in for one of the babies in a pink blanket.

My parents did not go along with my brilliant plan, but instead brought my brother home, along with a Ken doll.  They assured me, that just as my Barbie would love Ken, I would love my brother.

It took a few years for me to learn from Barbie…for me to actually love my little brother and accept the fact that I did not have a little sister.

Unfortunately for my brother, it took the first two years of his life, of me trying to re-create him to perform like a sister .  I dressed him up in my old tutu’s, put his blonde, curly hair into pig tails, convinced him pink was the new blue, and made him attend all of my tea parties.

Those days lasted but a minute…until he learned the joy of ripping off Barbies head, was amused by bulldozing my doll house, got poop on my tutu, and laughed hysterically as he discovered the thrill of spiting “tea” at me during our so-called tea parties!

My brother is wired as a full-fledged boy, loving all things dirty, masculine, and sporty.  He could never be transformed into the little sister I always wanted…

BUT, what I came to learn was he is the BEST brother anyone could dream up.  I grew to adore him, and today we are the best of buds.  We share our own language, have more inside jokes than we can keep up with, and he is the one person who has made me pee my pants laughing over his ridiculous humor.  His kind heart and love for Jesus make me an obnoxiously proud older sis.  I grow more thankful for him with each passing day, as he proves to be the most astonishing young man I have ever met.

However, having the best brother on the planet never took away my desire to have a sister.  Knowing I would never have one after my mother tied the tubes…I became determined to create my own “little sisters”.

“Sing O barren woman… for you have not been in labor.  For the children of the desolate one will be more than the children of her who is married” –Isaiah 54:1

The barren woman could not have children of her own, she had far more children in spirit…the children she ministered to.  Rather than being tied to the tasks of motherhood, she was allotted free time to pour into the souls of children.  She did not have to labor; except to serve the Lord by serving the many children He brought to her care.

Although I am not a barren woman (at least not that I know of), I was a barren sister.  God never gave me a little sister with the same blood running through her veins, but He blessed me with sisters far beyond what my Mom could have ever reproduced. 

If the Lord gives you a desire, He will fulfill it.  IN HIS OWN WAY…which is far greater!  If the Lord allowed me to have a sister, I might not have the heart for discipleship and the longing to create lasting, sister-like relationships with the young ladies He has graciously placed in my life.

I may not have the normal sister-hood with each one of my “sisters”...
the satisfaction of knowing her for life…
But God is faithful to give me fruitful seasons with His impeccable timing.  
Each “sister” will always have a place in my heart, and I will forever thank the Lord for the blessing she was to me!


  1. Loved reading this one, too, Ashley! And of course, the verse you posted, “Sing O barren woman… for you have not been in labor. For the children of the desolate one will be more than the children of her who is married” –Isaiah 54:1, really speaks to you know if you read my reply to your Verse 14 post first. :)

  2. Oh, a verse I thought I'd share with you:

    Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. -Ephesians 3:20

  3. <3 you and the relationship you have with your brother :)